Dear Intuition

Dear Intuition,

You are something that I hope for, wish for, dream of at times.  I constantly am searching for you and asking you to visit me.  One day I hope to find you, though the more I read, the more I think I need to just relax, that you are already within me.

Maybe there are times when I don't realize it is you, but I make the right decision anyway.  Maybe there are times when I'm looking for you and expecting something else.  I certainly do that enough with other things in my life.  Maybe you are more like wisdom than some supernatural power.

Regardless, I hope to someday be friends.

With all my love,

Chess

Dear Love

Dear Love,

You are what makes the world go round.  You make people feel special and welcome.  You are the support we need when we are feeling down, and the connection to others when we feel alone. You are the happy, licking puppy who is exuberant that his owner is home.  You are the bond between a couple, despite all their troubles.  You tie families together, most often described as dysfunctional. You are also the kick in the pants we need to get the ball rolling.  You are the hands that catch us when we fall.  Surely without you humans would perish.

For me, Love is the Tribe of Women in my life.  The unconditional support from all the special ladies in my life.  There is no bashing of each other's bodies.  We see the beauty in each other, physically and spiritually.  We share in each other's strife, but also in our joys.  We provide for each other when someone is lacking.  We cry for each other when someone is hurting.  We share our knowledge so that we can all grow into the best we can be.  We are the best cheerleaders.  We test each other to help ensure the growth.

I'm grateful for every one of these ladies in my life.  I know I am loved, and that makes a whole world of difference.

All my love,

Chess

April Love

 I am participating in a challenge hosted by Susannah Conway called April Love 2016.  The idea is to write a letter each day based on the prompts in this picture.  I might post some of my letters here, though some may be too personal for that.



However, in an act of love, I'll be offering half price drop-ins at my studio for people who bring friends.  So instead of paying $10 each, you and your friend get one hour of yoga for $5 each.

Namaste my friends,

Chess

What making yoga accessible means to me

The studio where I did my teacher training has a guiding principle that yoga should be accessible to all people. I, too, agree that yoga should be made accessible.  I chose to make it available to people in a different way.

Backstory

I hated sports when I was growing up.  I always felt inadequate and felt like I was never competitive or physical enough.  I had very low self-esteem and hated my body- I was significantly overweight. I suffered from depression and anxiety.

In college, I found belly dance, and then yoga, and discovered ways for me to be more physical without requiring me to be competitive. I lost a fair amount of weight, gained some confidence, and finally graduated college.  I still battle with depression and anxiety at times.

In 2012 I started taking formal belly dance lesson from Valerie of Bravo Belly Dance. I decided I wanted to teach yoga so I could help people find yoga and help them build their confidence.  I wanted to help student combat anxiety and depression like I have.

Today

I love teaching beginner students.  These students are just starting their yoga journey, many of them in retirement.  I love seeing the changes as they occur.  Some students find more strength- physical and emotional, some find weight loss, others find some quiet time for the monkey chatter.

I have been there and I love sharing my experiences and my lessons with others.  One saying in yoga is "the obstacle is the path."  I believe that is true and we are put on this earth to share these lessons with others; to connect with other people so they, too, can learn and expand.

The wobbly monkey

It's no secret that I often hit Dutch Brothers on my way to the studio before I teach.  The coffee is yummy and the people there are priceless.

One day a gentleman asked me where I was headed, like usual.  I told him I was headed to the studio to teach yoga and he asked me if I had any special poses for this class.  He then asked if I was teaching the Eiffel Tower.  I said that would be like what I call Extended Mountain, only the feet might be a little wider and the hands would be clasped above the head.  It wouldn't be much different.

Then he asked me if I might be teaching the wobbly monkey, to which I responded that I teach that all the time.  In reality, every day we are just wobbly monkeys trying to figure out this thing we call life.  Some days are better than others, but I doubt anyone truly feels completely stable every day of their lives.  We are always learning and trying our best.  We try to balance and we fall and get right back up.  Sometimes we get the help of our friends or family, and sometimes we don't.

It's ok to wobble, to be unsure of ourselves.  It marks our humanity.  I love that a simple, quick conversation over coffee brought this up.

Namaste,

Chess

Finding the courage to continue on

Some days are good and some days are bad.  We are all human and we have our ups and downs.  Some days when I have yoga to teach toward the end of the day, I question myself pretty harshly.  I have seen a few posts recently that say the same thing, so I know I'm not alone.

The thoughts that go through my head sound pretty abrasive when you read them.  Who am I to teach these students?  What makes me so special?  There are thousands of other yoga teachers out there, I will never get anywhere with this.  Those other teachers are better than I am.  I'm not a skinny yogini, I don't eat a Vegan diet.  Who would want to come to my class?

The things I need to remember, however, are that I'm the one who went through the training to teach something I love and feel anyone can benefit from.  I'm the one who worked hard to create my website and made sure I have a space to rent for teaching classes.  I need to take pride in that.

Also, the proper students will find me when the time is right for them.  So what if I'm not skinny?  That may mean that someone who isn't thin as well might look at yoga in a different light.  I eat meat, so what?  A lot of people do.  I love animals but I also need to take care of myself.  Realizing that is part of yoga, too (ahimsa for those who know a little more of what I'm talking about).  I also don't like exhaustively hot classes, which means others who don't like that will come to my classes.

In the end, I have friends and family who believe I can do this when I'm having a rough day.  Just when I think I am going to throw in the towel and give up, my phone rings and it is a lovely man who wants to come to my classes.  He's so sure of my classes that he is willing to pay for my 10 class card before even trying one.  Each time he comes to class, he tells me he loves my class and as soon as he's done with this card, he will buy another one.

Then I remember, it's not about me at all.  It's about the students.

Namaste my friends,

Chess

Making our own futures

After my yoga teacher training, I started teaching in a private studio with my own business model.  Spark of Life Yoga was my own little baby.  I tried also getting on at a couple of local studios, as I wanted more teaching and/or adjusting time.  One studio is now not offering classes and the second studio didn't have room for me.

I really want to teach beginners, and especially people who think that they can't do yoga.  I am not one to do crazy poses, I feel no need to do that.  I want to teach anyone I can that you don't have to be bendy in order to do yoga.

So what does this have to do with making our own futures?  I have decided to add a beginner yoga class to my schedule of classes.  The schedule opened up some so I am able to add this class on Wednesday nights. Despite a few closed doors, I am making my own doorway at this studio.  I hope you will come join me and make your own.

Bright Blessings,

Chess

Our journey in life

Lately I have been trying to figure out where my life is headed.  I have a few options in front of me, and I am so preoccupied with finding the right one.

I'm sure you know what that is like.  You don't really want any regrets in life.  Maybe that's why we get so busy.  We want everything in life.

Anyway, I'm tired of where I am.  I have this great opportunity to turn something I love into a business, but what if I stop loving it because I then need to make money off of it?  I could try driving close to an hour one way to work, but I would possibly be doing what I trained to do in college.  My husband also knows a couple of people from work who left to start their own company, and once again I could be doing what I trained to do.

At this point, I don't really know what I should be doing.  I feel a little overwhelmed, but am trying to take things one day at a time.  I am also trying not to lose sight of the future, so if I just keep plodding along, one day the future will be now and I will be looking back asking where all the time went.

I have discussed this with a few people, but don't want to burden anyone, as I know this is my issue and I need to figure it.  The best advice came at my Steampunk meeting where a couple of people decided to do Tarot card readings with Halloween coming up.  The second person who did a reading for me told me that the choice I make will be the right choice for me.

It changed my world!  I now am less worried about making the right decision.  I just need to pursue all the opportunities and see where the pieces fall.  That may mean that I will have all these opportunities fall into my lap and I will have to make a decision.  That may mean that only one will truly come through, and that will be the path I take.

The path I choose will be the right one for me.

Until later,

Chess

What is Yoga?

You can read a number of articles and books on yoga and get many different interpretations of what yoga is.  You will find historical background as well as religious theologies.  The beauty of yoga is you can make it what you want.  You can delve as deeply as you wish.

There are eight limbs of yoga that are commonly taught from Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras.

1. The first limb, yama, is the moral standards we place on ourselves and others.  They include: Ahimsa (non-violence), Satya (truthfulness), Asteya (non-stealing), Brahmacharya (moderation), Aparigraha (non-covetousness or non-hoarding).

2. Niyama, the second limb, revolves around self-discipline and spiritual observances. They include: Saucha (cleanliness or purity), Samtosa (contentment), Tapas (heat and spiritual austerities), Svadhyaya (study of the sacred scriptures and of one's self), Isvara pranidhana (devotion to a higher power)

3. Asanas are the postures practiced in yoga, comprising the third limb. Through the practice of asanas, we develop discipline and the ability to concentrate, both of which are necessary for meditation.

4. Pranayama, or breath work, is the fourth limb.  The idea is to gain a mastery of the respiratory system.  This can be done alone or while doing asanas.

5. Pratyahara, the fifth limb, means withdrawal or sensory transcendence. We essentially draw our sense inwards, removing outward distractions.

6. Dharana is about concentration, focusing on one thing at a time, rather than jumping from one thought to another every few seconds.

7. Dhyana is meditation.  This would be the cessation of the monkey chatter in our minds.

8. Samadhi is the final limb of yoga.  It is transcendence from this body and a connection with the divine.

In the US, the first experience with yoga is typically a yoga posture class.  Depending on the type of yoga, one might experience asanas and pranayama together.  Occasionally, the teacher will bring in some of the other aspects such as the Yamas, Niyamas, and Dhyana during the class.  The teacher might bring up one of the ways we conduct ourselves and expand upon that, and then invite the students to meditate on it while practicing the asanas or during the final resting pose at the end of class.

In my classes, I tend to talk about issues I face in daily life and how I am working to overcome them.  I know that religion and morals tend to be very personal, so try not to expand upon those aspects.  I primarily focus on the asana and pranayama, creating a type of moving meditation.  When students are more focused on where their bodies are in space and making sure they are breathing in and out at the proper times, they can quiet the chatter in their minds.  It is something that is vital to our busy lives. 

Light and love,

Chess

Recap of my most amazing week

I posted earlier that I was headed to St. Louis for a fabulous week of belly dance.  It was four days of going over the moves we use in ATS® and becoming certified in that style of dance.  We also had half an hour of yoga before class, and plenty of time in the evenings to hang out with the other students, chatting about everything under the sun, and exploring the area.

The steps themselves weren't too bad.  My instructor did a very good job of preparing us for this trip.  I spent the whole week with three other very lovely ladies from Colorado Springs, two of which I roomed with.  I loved going out to Historic St. Charles with them, as well as staying in and just relaxing.

There were 73 of us, so I also met some other fabulous dancers.  It was amazing to feel the collective energy when we were all dancing.  Carolena and Megha even complimented the whole group on how well we danced.  I met a few people that I truly loved, though I probably would have found more if I'd had more time.  I came away with a few more friends than I had going out there.

As for the inspiration, it came from the half hour yoga class in the mornings.  I loved spending that half hour doing the other thing I truly love.  During this trip, I came to the realization that I really should work on getting my two passions merged.  I am looking at creating a "yoga for belly dancers" class in the near future.  I have had little success getting students on Monday nights, so maybe I should make that the night I have this class.  Though this class would focus on the muscles used during belly dancing, I'm sure it could translate to other dance forms.  Additionally, just because it is targeting dancers doesn't mean others couldn't come as well.

I truly feel like this trip was a life changing event.  On top of becoming certified in this type of belly dancing, I decided where I should take my yoga business a little.  I also discovered that the money will work out.  We can go on trips and still have enough to pay the bills.  I can spend a week away from my husband and dogs and be just fine.  I learned it is better to have so many great memories than to not go on a trip for fear of not having enough cash. It is really nice to take a complete break from life to de-stress a bit.

I hope that you too can find some time to get away and do something you truly love.  Who knows what that will Spark?

Namaste,

Chess

Traveling Yoga

I am flying out to St. Louis today for a big belly dancing event today.  It is a type of certification for the type of belly dance I do.  It has been a long time coming, and I am nervous and excited all at the same time.

In some of the planning emails we received I noticed there will be a yoga class in the morning.  Imagine how excited I was!  It is a half hour Vinyasa for belly dancers.  It is a melding of my two passions!!  Vinyasa is the type of yoga I teach, and I have wanted to create one for belly dancers.  I just haven't had the time to research what poses would be best.  I figure most of them would work as long as you change it up.  But now I get to take this class and see what I can learn from it. Plus, it will be nice to do something that is relatively normal when my routine is completely shaken up.

I am very much looking forward to this time away from regular life.  While I won't be teaching class this week, I will be working on gaining a little more experience. Growing and learning is what keeps me going.

Namaste my friends,

Chess

Listening to your body

When I teach, I remind my students often to listen to their bodies.  Every day is different and I know all too well that it also affects our asana.

A couple weeks ago, I was at my usual Sunday morning Yoga in the Park.  For whatever reason, I had no energy and felt very wonky.  There was one point when I just felt too tired to complete some of the Sun B.  Consequently, I sat down, grabbed some water, then moved into Child's Pose.  I sat in that pose until the instructor moved everyone into core.  I don't feel guilty about that.

In the US, we are pushed to compete, with others and ourselves.  Always pushing harder and harder.  It's no wonder that Yoga Flows and Hot Yoga are so popular here.  At some point, though, something has to give.  There is a limit to what we can do and when we run into those limits we must take a step back for ourselves.

The point of asana is to be mindful and listen to what our body needs.  Take the water break, towel off, rest in Child's Pose, or even sit there and just watch what is going on.  It will serve us better than pushing through our limits and potentially injuring our bodies.

Namaste my friends,

Chess

Touch

One thing that the training forced me to do is touch others, including people I don't really know.  In the US, it is mostly forbidden to touch others, unless you know them really well.  When passing someone, you try your hardest not to brush up against them.  You say "pardon me" when you bump into another person, or even if you came close to it.  You even do a little dance when two people move to the same side when trying to pass each other.

There wasn't much hugging or touching going on with my family members when I was growing up.  I find it very awkward when others touch me on the shoulder, or even worse, when others try to hug me.  If I am consoling someone, that isn't hard for me, but any other time it just feels so weird.

The worst part is, this hurts us.  We don't feel connected with other people.  In our digital world, we find it easier to not touch or connect with our friends and family.  Then when we try to reconnect, we feel awkward or out of place. No wonder we love sex so much.  It is one of the only places we can touch each other and know full well what is expected from that touch.

So now I am having to learn how to give positive energy to my students through touch, which is very difficult for me, because I don't really know how to touch people.  But just like anything else, the more I do it, the more I learn.  The more I learn, the less awkward I feel doing it.

And through this, I also realize that some of my students probably feel the same way.  They don't know how to be touched.  So I am learning how to be gentle when working with my students, so that they feel comfortable and cared for.  They are important and if I am the only person who makes them feel seen, heard, and touched, then I am doing my job right.

Love and Light,
Chess

Scaling back

I have been feeling very run down lately.  I think I have been doing too much lately.  A number of people have told me to slow down and relax a little.  Sometimes if you aren't listening to your own body, you have to listen to your loved ones.  They know you well enough, and can see you in a different light.  They will see things that you may not.

In an effort to find a little more time in my week, I have decided to scale back a little with my yoga classes.  Right now, I have students on Fridays, but not Mondays.  Since I started teaching, I have been showing up on Monday nights in the chance that I might have students.  It takes time out of my evening that I could be using to do some other things.  Consequently, I have decided that I won't be at the studio unless I know for sure that I will have a student.

Technology allows communication to be much easier now.  Students and potential students can text me, email me, or message me on Facebook to let me know that they are interested or will be there for class.

I look forward to seeing my students each week, but it is very hard to sit for twenty to thirty minutes waiting for no students and then drive home.  I hope this helps me relax a little.

Namaste my friends.

Chess

Where my passion lies

First, a little back story.

In high school, I was definitely overweight.  I was easily 200 pounds, though I never weighed myself to really know. I hated gym and sports.  I was never really the competitive type and was usually picked last on a team.  In middle school I purposefully took band a choir to get out of gym class. In high school I couldn't get out of it.  Let me tell you how awful swim class was for me (it was required to graduate).

After I graduated high school, I went to college like most of my other class mates.  My family isn't terribly wealthy, so I went to the local University, lived with my parents, worked part time and went to school full time.  I couldn't afford to pay for a parking permit or gas, so I walked to school.  It was 40 minutes one way.  Needless to say, I lost a lot of weight.  I went from that 200 or more down to about 135!

I took a non-western music class where I did my final project on belly dancing.  I was interested in it, so I figured it was a good place to learn about it.  I started doing the belly dance DVDs and a few friends create a belly dance club on campus so I joined them.  I learned a lot about my body during that time and had a lot of fun in the process.

One semester I found myself one class short of the full time status which I needed to keep my parent's insurance.  I decided to take a yoga class they had there, thinking it would help me become more flexible for belly dance.  I knew one of the famous belly dancers also did yoga, and she was so gloriously bendy.  The Iyengar class taught me that while I was thin, I wasn't very strong.  I found a new love to go with my love for belly dancing.

Soon, I realized that I had found some things that would keep me fit and strong that weren't competitive and were actually fun.  Sometimes that is the biggest part of working out.

Now, back to my passion.  I want to help other people like me find the value and benefit of yoga.  I am perfectly comfortable teaching people who have been doing yoga for years, who are looking for something new each time.  I also love to teach people who have never done yoga or are just beginning their journey.

Yoga can be intimidating, only because of the way that it has been portrayed.  Most people think people who do yoga are skinny and completely flexible.  In reality, they have become flexible over time by continually doing yoga.  As for the feeling that everyone is watching you in class, really all the other students in class are focusing on their own bodies, not yours.

I invite you to join a class somewhere near you.  Go find the benefits yourself.  Take the leap and try something new.

Namaste my friends,

Chess

Gratitude

This last Friday I decided to discuss gratitude.  It is a theme I see a lot about, and a while ago I decided I need to be more grateful for the things I have.  There are many people out there who have less than I do, and have experienced much more than I have.  I suggested to my students that they work on being grateful more in their lives as well.  It is easy to get caught up in the "I want" game, and being grateful for what we have quiets that game some.

I have tried to make it a habit of posting one thing I am grateful for at the end of the day.  I do that on twitter and you can find me here if you want to follow me, or just read through some of my tweets.  Also, I have a link to the right above my blog feed if that is easier.  I use the hashtag #dailygratitude for each of those posts, so you may be able to find them that way, as well.  I encourage you to join me in my daily gratitude.  One day I would love to see that in the trends!

Namaste my friends,

Chess

Themes for class

One of the things we learned in Teacher Training was choosing themes for class, setting the tone.  Since I have only had students on Fridays so far, I spend my whole week thinking about what I want to use for my theme.

My first class I used new beginnings, naturally.  I had a student who was completely new to yoga and a student who has been doing yoga for a while.  I thanked them for coming to my first class, and proceeded to discuss listening to their bodies while starting something new.

My second class I spoke about patience.  For me, I know that I find myself expecting things to be a certain way already.  It is hard to maintain patience.  I told my students it is something I work on, on and off the mat.  I try to take life one day at a time and I try to remember that it takes time to get some of the more difficult poses.  I am still working on crow, and that is one of the poses we learned to teach during training.  We easily practiced this one two or three times a week toward the end of training.

I will try to post my musings I use during class here for people to follow.  I think it will hold me accountable a little more, and promote my education in yoga some.

Love and light,

Chess

My business

In the last month and a half since I graduated from my yoga teacher training, I have been working very hard on my business.  I created my business name: Spark of Life Yoga.  I have a studio that I am teaching at on Mondays and Fridays.  I have a facebook page and a website: http://www.sparkoflifeyoga.com/.

I'm very excited to be able to share my love of yoga with others.

My first class went well, I had two students.  I had some technical difficulties, but I'm glad I was able to get some of that stuff out of the way with my first class.  No one showed up to my second class, so I used the time to get some photos for my website.

All in all, it has been a very busy month.  I am hoping that things go a lot smoother in the next month.

Namaste my friends,

Chess