Friday, March 7, 2014

Being "selfish"

As many people may know, I have been very busy lately.  I already work a 40 hour week at a job that I don't particularly find inspiring.  I spend about three to five hours every week working on my Belly Dancing.  I recently started the Yoga Teacher Training.  It is a 200 hour course over 10 weeks, so essentially I am spending 20 hours a week working on the yoga stuff.  It's like a part time job.  Add on top of that the usual stuff of wanting to spend time with my husband and family, and I am getting run down.

I am having to re-evaluate most things, including work.  My PTO bank is extremely high because I never take time off.  Even when I am sick, I work.  I constantly feel like I am letting someone down in my life, because I aim to make everyone else happy.

With this YTT, I am learning that I need to take care of myself, and some people will just have to deal with it.  I need to learn that what other people think of me doesn't really matter.  I know I am smart and a hard worker, and if taking a few days off from work makes me look like less of a hard worker, that's not my problem.  We have PTO for a reason, and I should be able to use it.

This past Monday I came into work and requested two days off in the beginning of the week next week, knowing that I am getting tired.  I waited too long, and now I am sick again.  I very rarely get sick, so I know this is related to stress, and most of it is job stress.

So I am going to take my two days, despite issues that are coming up and meetings that I should attend.  My co-workers can handle it without me, and notify me of any changes when I return.

It's time I put myself first, even if that seems "selfish" to others.



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